Marketing and children

Part of my job is marketing. I contribute to the my business’ marketing plan which forms part of the country plan and so on. I have taken courses. I attend meetings. I interpret and act on segmentation studies. I even know what segmentation study means. I actually like it. So although I am not a marketing genius, I know something about it.

My other job is being a mum. So in my train commute home, I change from one side of the marketing game to the other.

I have to praise Italy for one thing – Italians do tend to prefer quality over quantity. It may be because of space (apartments have limited clutter space) and looking good (Italians are obsessed with looking good and, more the point, looking better than each other). Italy is also very nationalistic. Italians simply think Italian products are better. So combine these and you get people who have not completely succumbed to the American marketing machine and who prefer a select few good items than many things of dubious quality. How does this translate into a child’s life over here? Well, Disney is big but you never see kids decked out head to toe in Disney princess outfits (more likely to see a toddler in Ralph Lauren or Abercrombie – don’t get me started…), no Cars toddler beds and no Toy Story wallpaper. Maybe Hello Kitty but that’s another story…

What is my point? It is that I am already thinking about this even though my kids are 1 and 3. I am worried!

I am very aware of how insidious marketing can be and how companies intentionally target consumers and parents starting from the get go. But I mean really – “According to The New York Times, [Disney] is laying the groundwork to capture a whole new group of potential customers: newborns. By partnering with Our365, a portrait company that pays hospitals in exchange for exclusive rights to take and sell baby pictures, Disney will be able to market its newest line, Disney Baby, directly to new mothers in hospital maternity wards.”

Shudder. The word predatory comes to mind.

From an educator’s point of view I see that it can be less than ideal, from a parent’s point of view I see that it can border on immoral. From a marketing person’s point of view, they’re freakily good at what they do.

I wondered if I am exaggerating in my interest and worry. If you think I am on the other end of the spectrum, with only wooden, educational toys in our living room, exclusively organic wool sweaters keeping my kids warm and countless varieties of organic beans and pulses in my larder then think again! We have some wooden toys, some “educational” toys, no organic wool and a many beans (but my husband is Cuban after all) as well as some seriously sugar-laden cakes, plastic toys with no point to them at all, branded stuff and some average cotton-blend clothing.

So maybe I am just starting to think about these things too early? Well, apparently not. In a fairly blatant acknowledgement that advertising does affect small kids, some places have banned certain forms of advertising to the very young. Some research shows that aggressive marketing and advertising, and the habits these support, can lead to excessive materialism in the very young which may then have a negative effect of kids’ self-image let alone their overall values.

OK that’s enough of that. Reading the following articles was an eye-opener so if you want more, read away:

http://www.media-awareness.ca/english/parents/marketing/dealing_marketing.cfm

http://parentingsquad.com/forget-the-princess-problem-disney-develops-new-marketing-campaign-aimed-at-newborns

http://www.media-awareness.ca/english/parents/marketing/issues_kids_marketing.cfm

So my approach is… (drum roll please)…

Moderation. It’s all about moderation.

We have Toy Story 1, 2, and 3 DVDs at home and we have watched them about 6 thousand, 5 hundred and twenty three times. Each. We have Muchacha Pelo Largo No Shoes (Rapunzel) and we would have Cars DVDs too but I think the stories are for older kids. We have Toy Story and Cars Lego, a Cars ball, and some Cars, um, cars. A Bob the Builder shirt and Sesame Street underpants. Oh and the coolest Toy Story hoodie that our friend brought us from Disneyland! A treasured possession! I am sure there will be many, many more Disney/Sesame Street/ whatever clothes and toys in our future too. Is that OK with me? Dang right it is. As long as it doesn’t take over that is. OK firstly, I love Disney Pixar productions. They are genius. They were at the forefront of computer animation with Toy Story 1 and just keep getting better and better. The stories are good too. My only major complaint is that all characters are WASPs, with the exception of Spanish Buzz’s bit part in Toy Story 3, but I give credit for how Jessie is a strong girl who can hold her own.

I get a kick out of certain branded items we have. So does René. Growing up with so many things banned and with such limited resources means that now I think he gets a kick out of being able to watch whatever he wants and buy stuff. That said, 30+ years of anti-capitalist doctrine has had its positive effect and he shuns the idea of going overboard. Thank you Fidel. In Cuba the only “marketing” you see is propaganda. Internet use by your average Cuban is impossible or at best, rare.

The thing is, though, there will come a time when advertising will bite. “Advertising at its best is making people feel that without their product, you're a loser. Kids are very sensitive to that.” One day will my boys feel inferior because they do not have the latest Disney / Ambercrombie / Nike whatever? Probably. Will I be tempted just to get it for them so that they feel better. Probably. Do I hope and pray that my voice of reason will kick in and say, “Don’t do it?”. Yes.

As parents I think what we need to do is try our damndest to instil as much self-confidence into our kids as possible so that they do not feel entirely defined by the label on their jeans or the type of mobile phone they use. I think giving them abilities, knowledge and experience can compensate for not having the latest “in” thing and can also help them, no matter how young they are, put it all into perspective through example and education. Sure they will have their “look” and their interests, be it preppy, hippy, rocker or nerd and yes, they will have some related items to support their personal style. But what we want to avoid is them feeling they need things in order to feel good and fit in.

So bring on the Grover underpants and long live Woody and Buzz but in moderation and with a touch of healthy cynicism and a large dose of fun. So maybe not this:

My Child the Linguistic Experiment

You know you’re a language obsessed when the following happens:

Elias says, “Mummy you [slight pause] found this!” and my response was, “Holy! That was the past tense! Well sone Elias!!”

Elias and Alex were playing at Daniel’s first birthday party. Onlookers included Jo (an English teacher), Jo’s dad (a linguist), Jo's mum (a teacher), Caroline (another English teacher) and me. When the boys started playing in English together, there was a flurry of whispered excitement from ALL of us. "Oh look, they're playing in English!"... "What language are they speaking? Oh! English!" and so on. It was hilarious!!! Talk about a scientific experiment!!!

Christmas shopping - A Users Guide

OK before I go into how smug I feel I need to specify a few things so as not to seem Miss Judgeypants by my entry below:
- I love Christmas
- I love buying gifts for people
- I argue with my husband regularly

Now, onto the story.

I had a day off and decided to use it to do the Christmas shopping. I went alone to a shopping centre with a stunningly tight budget and therefore a short list.

Two hours later I was done. But wow, the things I saw might have scarred me for life. So I have made this handy, How To Shop Without Freaking Out guide:

Take it easy – it’s Christmas
I saw several mothers and fathers cussing each other out, the worst being the mother screaming at the father, “Ma che cazzo!! Tu vuoi compare tutto quello che non ha chiesto lui!!!” (=”What the f**k!! You want to buy everything that he didn’t ask for!!”). Umm, lady? Take it easy. You’re missing the point. Poor things, I almost felt sorry for them.

Random gifts do not equal love
Father shoving a huge box of something unknown into his toddler son’s face saying, “You like that? You want it?” Umm, sir? You’re missing the point.

Remember why you’re there
I saw shopping carts filled but I mean FILLED with toys for one child. Major but I mean MAJOR cheap, horrible, will break in 5 minutes plastic stuff. Arghghgh! Why buy that for anyone?!?!? You’ll be chucking it out after one day! Not to mention the, oh forget it. Now, where did I put my anti-consumerism, no global, Che Guevara t-shirt?

Go wild, go at lunchtime
Italians are infamous for doing things at the same time. Coffee at 11. Lunch at 1.30. Dinner at 8. OK, maybe I should say they are infamous for eating on a schedule. The place where I was doing my shopping was heaving with people at 12.30. At 1 it was a desert. I toodled around, humming to myself and calmly chose things off shelves. People - Italians - do yourselves a huge favour, postpone lunch a tad and enjoy an empty store to do some calm and happy shopping. Or not, actually, because then if you're all there at lunchtime, when will I go?!?

Remember who you’re with
If you really have to go shopping with your children in a crowded hot place, remember a few things please:
1. Undo or take off their coats, it’s 40° in there.
2. Your kids will get bored and over stimulated so keep the trip short. Don’t feed them chocolate and then expect them to stay in the shopping cart for 2 hours either.
3. Be nice to your children because they really would much rather be at home or in a park running around and getting dirty. Avoid screaming at them. It. Doesn’t. Help.

No need to thank me just yet, you can do so when Christmas is over.

Yours Smugly,

Mrs Judgeypants.

Jesus in a Sleigh?

So now that Elias is 3, Christmas is taking on... meaning. It is an interesting exercise.

Last year I asked René what we were planning on doing about Santa Claus and his immediate response was: “Tell him the truth. I’m not lying to my son.”. Thanks go to Fidel for that one I think. At that point we had time though, seeing as Elias was only 2, so I didn’t pursue the topic too much.

So now here we are again and one year later, a bit more thought needs to go into the Christmas thing. Or does it?

Do you know I never knew until last year that some people wait until the night before Christmas to put all the presents under the tree and then say they ALL came from Santa? My family didn’t. In fact my memories of Santa are pretty vague. The stockings were Santa’s doing but the presents were from mummy, daddy, the cat, the horse and teddy bear and other funny gift-givers. When I asked my mum if Santa was real, she said absolutely yes and told me the story of Saint Nicholas who was, in fact, a real person. So that was a nice transition and in any case, we didn’t have the Santa cult in my household to begin with.

Of course Santa comes up in books and films and so on, people tell us that Santa will be here soon and so on. We don’t talk about it much at home as in we do not say Santa is coming etc. The whole idea of be good or else does not appeal to me (and the Elf of the Shelf creeps me out too). Not that I am a spoil sport, just that I don’t really get it. As for René, there was no Santa at all in his upbringing so it is really completely foreign to him and would be hard to get him to buy into it now.

Now don’t get me wrong. Our tree was up on November 30 thanks to… Daddy!!! The Cuban!!! Christmas was a regular working day in Cuba until around 1999 (thanks to Pope John Paul’s visit) and Cubans are so poor, there is never any chance of being able to buy gifts anyway. But René quite likes the tree idea. OK, he is a bit minimalist in that he thinks it’s quite nice with lights and about ten ornaments on it max, so over the past 2 weeks I have been adding a bit of tinsel here and there and an extra ornament or two… Xavi has been diligently undoing my work so maybe the minimalist idea is a go this year.

Looks like the laid-back attitude to Santa is where we're heading and if so, I have to say I am almost relieved. I will definitely tell the kids (and Daddy) about the whole origin of Christmas – religious, pagan and more. Plus in Italy sometimes it’s the baby Jesus who brings the gifts to the kids (woah – there’s a weird one, does he ride a sleigh?!? Is he not cold? He’s a baby for goodness sake!!) so that takes care of the extreme Santa cult over here. Christmas is Catholic in Italy. It is not half as commercial as it is in Canada so that takes the focus of things a bit.

As for presents, you may think I am weird, I actually asked Elias what he wanted for Christmas. We decided on a scooter, blue please and a police car (sigh…). I asked a few times to make sure it was not a passing phase, and then didn’t bring it up again. Why did I do that? Man, we are not economically in a good way so if I buy something, I want it to be used and enjoyed!!! With a 2 presents max limit and that’s it, if they are not successful, Christmas will be a bummer present-wise!

I guess what is really important is that everyone is happy at least once a year, and why not at Christmas. So whether you have an Elf on the Shelf, or 30 presents under the tree, look out the window for a baby in a sleigh or don’t even have a tree because you think it is a Pagan atrocity, who cares?!? Christmas is a great reason or excuse to eat yummy things, hang out with people you love, give and receive and listen to choirs singing.

So on that note, Merry Christmas everyone!! Oh, and someone give baby Jesus a parka!